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Of Eating Paula’s Crème Filled Muffin

After posting last week’s entry into the Our Decades of Open Marriage series, I told my wife that I’d totally forgotten most of the content of that entry. The only part I remembered was how after coming from a hotel, she’d proudly told me she’d been a good girl and used one of the condoms she carried with her. Yet when I went down on her, as I usually did when she came home from dates, she tasted of semen. When I looked up from between her legs she just laughed and said she’d been too turned on the second time to bother with the condom. Unlike most of the individual events I recount, that moment stuck in my mind.

When I retold that story to her, she just shook her head and said “Now it’s hard to understand why we liked doing that so much.”

Her response got me thinking. How did it come to pass that eating her lover’s semen from her vagina and off her labia became not only normal for us, but a special bonding time? It seems for both of us, time (and illness) has made those days seem remote, even dream-like, even though it was less than a decade ago. It's funny how time has that effect.

First off, I would understand why some people would simply not believe those things happened, because less than a decade removed from that story it seems incredible to us too. Not gross or wrong, just hard to wrap our head around the fact it was such a normal part of our life. I also understand why those into the “cuckolding” fetish see it as a power play in making the husband eat her lover's cum. It would be easy to see that some people would see that as a way of humiliating the husband. Yet, for us, it was no such thing. Rather it was a wonderful joint experience where she and I felt a oneness in her sexual explorations.

I asked myself, how did it come to be just part of our routine for her to sprawl out on the bed with her legs spread after a date for us both to enjoy me eating her out? Or, while we were having a threesome with another man, as soon as he pulled out, she fully expected me to clamp my mouth down on her vulva.

And to be clear, it wasn’t just about the semen. Most of the time with new men she used a condom, so the ritual was not necessarily about sharing cum. Over the years, while we never considered ourselves swingers, a very large percentage, perhaps close to half, of the time she had sex with another man it was a one-off thing. As the old saying goes “You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince.” So, her having sex with someone new was always a major part of our open marriage. But with an established lover or a man she’d just met, me kissing & licking her labial lips and eating the fluids from her vagina was about showing my love for her and her sexuality in the most tangible way possible.

Upon reflection, that practice goes back to the early years of our marriage. Within a few years of our 1986 wedding, she confessed to me how often she’d be talking to men and she’d imagine having sex with them. It was in those early years I decided (and told her) that should the opportunity arise, she would not be betraying me to have sex with another man. It became a little game of ours for her to tell me of men she met that day that she’d fantasized about screwing. Thus, well before she ever took a lover, she and I enjoyed talking about it.

Then around 25 years ago she and her best friend became lovers. She’d told me she was attracted to both males and females years before, so this was not a big surprise. One evening she came home from her best friend/lover’s house and told me that not only had she and her best friend had sex, but she had sucked her friend’s husband’s cock too. Kissing her… putting my tongue in her mouth, which had just had another man’s cock in it was a turn-on for both of us.


I can’t give you a firm answer. Possibly since I wasn’t there to see it, it was a way of bringing me into the experience. But after that, anytime she sucked his cock she’d tell me and we’d make out right off. Thus, putting my mouth where another man’s penis has been became ritualized even before she ever had vaginal sex outside of our marriage.

Fast forward about six years. She’d been going out clubbing with the single women from Victoria’s Secret once or twice a week. Not surprisingly the VS girls were very sexually active. Initially, she would make out with guys and they would feel her up, sometimes right on the dance floor. When she got home, she would always be horny, and she liked me to go down on her first. We had already agreed that she was free to do as she liked and she had no obligation to tell me what she did. I remember distinctly the first time I tasted the unmistakable flavor of semen when I went down on her. (Note; by then she’d had a partial hysterectomy so birth control was not an issue).

She would neither confirm nor deny what she’d done. Mostly that was because she still had not fully quashed that fundamentalist Baptist upbringing of hers. She would do things in the moment and then feel extreme guilt afterward. Even when she’d used a condom, I could tell how sloppy and open she was. So, we began with me eating her out after she’d had sex as her way of telling me what she’d done without actually having to say she had casual sex.

When, in time, she finally was able to enjoy thinking about what she’d done afterward, having her husband eat her out after she got home was a comfort and a bonding time for us. This was especially true because she enjoyed other men banging her like crazy. Back in those days, it was not uncommon for her to have a bruised labia from the vigor of the pounding she’d taken. Once she even had bruises where the man’s fingers gripped her tightly while he fucked her super hard. Thus, having her husband softly kiss and lick her labia afterward was a comfort.

So, for multiple reasons, it became the routine for her to come home ready for sex with me. Most of the time sex began with cunnilingus and moved to slow intercourse while we talked and kissed.

Thus, it brings us to what I would call her decade of free sex from about 2005 to 2015 where she had both casual sexual encounters and lovers as a normal part of her life and of our marriage. Having her come home after sex lost its forbidden nature, and simply became a normal part of life. We didn’t make love every time she got home simply because it became too routine and she’d often come home late on nights I had to be at work early the next day. But, if I was awake when she got home, the normal thing to do was for me to eat her out before we made love. It was just what we did.

It was much less common for me to be there in the bed and watch a man cum in Paula, but when I did, she just expected that I would use my tongue to scoop up the semen that was oozing out of her and swallow it down. For us it was not a matter of kink or anything like that, it was just what we did.

So, with last week’s Part 62 of Our Decades of Open Marriage, I recounted a few details of two of the three Hotel Dates she had that week, but in both, it recorded I’d gone down on her and eaten her lover’s semen. However, one of those three events only received a comment that she had a wonderful time. It did not record what we did when she got home. Perhaps I was already asleep. The truth is that for her to come home after having sex was so routine, I only noted that she said that she’d had a good time. It would not have been of special note so I didn’t even bother to write about it. As I concluded in the post it was just what worked for us. Not kink, not showing off, but what worked for us.

As I’ve been working on Chapter 56 of In Search of the Final Freedom, it comes up that Cooper had several Crème de Bonnie muffins in the weeks before Valentine’s Day. This should not be surprising since Cooper and Bonnie are just a reflection of Paula and me when we were a little younger… and for us, me eating the cream from her muffin was an important and meaningful part of our decades of open marriage.

If we can share her lover’s cum, what can’t we share?

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Nov 04, 2023

The fact that you modeled Cooper and Bonnie after you and Paula, makes In Search of the Final Freedom such a unique sex-positive narrative. You mentioned an important reason for writing Final Freedom:

“In this novel, I have two clearly stated goals in the title. One is to write on a serious socio-political topic and the other is to entertain with erotica. If I were to write a serious academic tome on the issue of sexual repression it might get scholarly praise, but it would not be read. So, I've wrapped a hundred pages of intellectual argument in a thousand pages of an entertaining novel filled with realistic characters and equally realistic sex. Importantly, when I write of sexual things,…

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