In Search of the Final Freedom: An Erotic Socio-Political Novel
BOOK FOUR
Sounding the Clarian Call
Chapter 62
Speaking Straight to Teens
Once again Bonnie slipped into the booth at Waffle House to meet with her three friends for breakfast before they all started their work week. This little ritual had rapidly become very important to Bonnie. She supposed it was largely due to her travel schedule, but also there was something grounding about normal friends that seemed to have been slowly squeezed out of her life as of late.
First off were questions to Trish about her weekend in Augusta with Richard Ravenell. To which she gave a bubbling report of her second weekend with the man who appeared to be moving into their friend’s life. Trish went on to say that though Mr. Ravenell would not be at Hilton Head the whole week of Spring Break, he would be in the same house where Trish had met him two years before from Wednesday to Sunday.
DeeDee put in that she had agreed to let her daughter spend the week with the Simms family on Hilton Head. Whereupon Trish said “Now I have to call my mother and give her a heads up that Byron and Baily would be sharing a room. I’m not sure how she will respond. She’s been kinda funny about those things in the past few years. She seems to have become much more tolerant of that sort of stuff since my father passed. I know for sure she wouldn’t have let me do that when I was Byron’s age, but I don’t expect she’ll put up much of a fuss. After all, I’m paying for the rental, the most she could do is refuse to come stay with us, and I don’t expect her to do that.”
Slosh asked about the progress on her new house.
Trish lit up. “Oh, it is beautiful, better than I’d hoped. It seems like I’ve been waiting forever, with the permits and the problem with making the septic work in the red clay, and all the rain back at the beginning. But, after we get back from the beach I will start packing and start ferrying stuff over there. I’m not taking very much of the furniture I’ve been using in the apartment. The house is a new start for me and almost everything, inside and out, will be new.”
Inside Bonnie gasped at how much she must be spending on furniture alone. From her memory, the house was something like 4,000 ft². But, from what Bonnie understood about her divorce settlement, Trish walked away with a not so small fortune. She could afford to start her new life with a big new house filled with nice things.
Bonnie then updated her friends on their ongoing plans to fly out to the island of St. Martin for the week. “From what I can tell, Misty and I will only be meeting with the man who owns the company, Richard Kyle, once or perhaps twice over the week. It is apparent that Mr. Kyle really wants Misty to sign with him. Both Mike and his friend, the entertainment lawyer, have said so, and I trust their judgment in this. It is something about the consolidation of the industry crowding out smaller players. I’m not sure I understand all of it, but the result is that we are being put up for a full week. Our only major expense will be airfare for Lamar, and that isn’t as much as we’d expected.”
Slosh asked, “Have you looked into what there is to do on St. Martin?”
“Cooper seems to be more excited than anyone because of the colonial architecture on the island. I expect I’ll get dragged along for a tour whether I want to or not.”
Her friends laughed.
“But mostly we’ll be looking for locations for Misty to shoot photos, or for one of us to shoot photos of her for her new website. She’s been teaching Lamar photography since Christmas, and since it is warming up, she’s had him shooting outside. Last week the two of them did a nude set with Joanne. With the nice weather yesterday, Misty had him shoot Mimi on the daybed by the pool in some of my micro-bikinis, topless and nude. As I understand it, he will be doing an almost nude set of Gabby & Hannah tomorrow after school. But Misty won’t be there because this week she’ll be working late on the yearbook from Monday till Thursday night. Since St. Martin has a large public nude beach, several others where nudity is tolerated and all the rest are top optional, I expect Lamar will be doing quite a few photos of me and his sister for the new site.”
DeeDee asked, “So you are going to let her post nude photos of you on her site?”
Bonnie replied, “Well it’s not like our nude photos don’t already have a website, and in the last month I’ve posted a couple of nude photos on my blog, with a couple more scheduled for next week. We have talked about it, and we’ve decided that we are already in this all the way so there is no reason not to embrace it. But Misty is adamant that her website will not be a porn site, rather it will be a sex-positive site that promotes her values. Though it is the promised photos of the two of us in the nude that drew the interest of Mr. Kyle and his company, to Misty it is much more.”
Trish asked, “So she will be posting photos of her having sex?”
“Oh yes. We have the model releases to use the photos I took of her on Friday. My pictures of Misty with Salvador and Caitlin are pretty good if I say so myself.” That statement led to Bonnie telling her friends about Misty’s birthday photo shoot.
Next came Slosh’s turn to report on her plans for Spring Break.
“As I told you last week, I plan on flying down to Miami to spend the week with Elijah & Holly Feldman. But when Bonnie’s family firmed up their plans to go to St. Martin, I called Holly and asked if it would be OK with them if I brought Sarah with me. She thought it was a great idea, especially since they have been looking for an easy way to transition their pool this summer into clothing optional. Their daughter, Hannah, has been texting Sarah since summer and really looks up to her as a role model. Holly’s thought is if Sarah and I both go nude at their pool, it won’t seem too far out for Hannah when she, Elijah and some of their close friends do too.”
The other mothers nodded in understanding. Bonnie couldn’t help but wonder how Mira was doing. She hadn’t talked to her since February. They had felt a real connection, but the distance was simply not something that could easily be bridged… although Slosh and Elijah seemed to be managing it. They’d had two weekends together in addition to the week Slosh and Mike had been at their home over Christmas break.
With an overexaggerated pout DeeDee put in, “Well some people have to support themselves and don’t get off for Spring Break.” But then she smiled, “That’s OK, I love my little business… and my little side mission as a Rahab. I will be at Bonnie’s house Friday night. That will be nice, playing house in your big lovely home. Don’t get me wrong, I love my little old house, but sometimes I think of buying something bigger, then I consider what a mortgage would cost and I tell myself no. And, I also know that a year from September, Bailey will be gone and I will be alone in that little house. I wouldn’t want anyplace larger when that day comes.”
That led to a conversation this group had about once a month about their kids growing up and how they would soon be flying away from their nests. Since all of their children were exemplary students with a bright future ahead of them, they all felt successful in parenting; but still the idea of them going off to college was both joyous and frightening.
****************
When Bonnie disembarked from her flight from Atlanta to the Burlington International Airport, she was glad she’d worn her long coat. It might be April, but it was cold. From there she took a shuttle for the hour-long ride to the venue where she would be staying until her flight out on Saturday morning. Right off Bonnie could tell this conference was very different than anything she'd done before. The conference was listed as a Summit of Christian Liberation Leaders & Family Retreat. Rather than just a conference of a few days, it was a full week long, though Bonnie would only be presenting on Thursday and Friday.
Rather than being held at a big city hotel, it was at a ski resort in the Vermont mountains. When she arrived at the little commuter airport, she was not met by an event organizer as was normal. However, it was not hard to find the right shuttle to take her from the tiny airport to the resort. It was just getting to be dusk when the little bus pulled up to the main lodge, the first thing she could not miss was there were as many children and teens as adults. While she talked to teenagers at Youth Group every week and sex had been on the agenda more than once, this was the first time she'd been asked to talk specifically to teenagers at a conference.
Certainly, the organizers knew the content of her presentations. Didn't they?
Back in late January, the FFF confirmed that Bonnie would do three presentations in addition to the one for teenagers. Thus, she'd had several months to prepare a totally new presentation. She and Amy had agreed that for the presentation to the teenagers, rather than photos, they would use cartoonish illustrations. While Amy could have done them herself, she thought it would be good to offer the job to her group of talented students who were looking for their first commission. Amy and Bonnie's idea was that a student illustrator would work in a style more in tune with today's teens.
Bonnie had evaluated proposals from four art students and picked the images of a young man with a style that had some of the realistic grittiness of modern graphic novels, but Disney enough to take off the edge. After a few sessions going over the outline of her talk and what things she wanted illustrated with the artist, he produced some demos. Though the colored images were wonderful, they were just too busy. She had to explain to him that she needed images that would support what she was saying, but not so intricate that the audience would focus on the slide and not listen. The second set of proofs were just what she wanted, and she set him to work on the full set of eighty-three illustrations.
A month later she was glad she'd already started on the illustration set when she got the presenter's information packet. In it, there was a note requesting that for all presentations for children and teens where the topic involved nudity and/or sexuality that the presenters should use drawings and/or artwork, rather than photographs. Bonnie was glad she'd already planned for that. As per the convention's request, she'd sent in the lecture outlines for the presentations and short summaries for the convention catalog. Just to be sure Bonnie included all the images that had been completed with the outline for the teen session. All she got in return was "Everything looks great."
The resort consisted of a large ski lodge beside the main hotel. On the other side of the lodge was what looked to be a small convention center. This wasn't Colorado and the ski season had already ended, but there was still a good bit of snow on the ground and to Bonnie it was cold. Up close she realized that the place was not nearly as nice or well-maintained as the resort she and Cooper had stayed at in Teton Pass, Montana several years ago. In the convention center, she found an information table and was directed to the VIP/Speaker check-in to the right of the main registration table. Since the conference was already in its third day, there only appeared to be a few people registering. There was no line at all at the main registration table. She always felt a little guilty that as a speaker she routinely bypassed the registration lines at conferences. At the VIP/Speaker table, she met Deborah Cater, the woman with whom she had been corresponding.
The middle-aged woman stood when Bonnie approached. "Bonnie Campbell! I'm so pleased to meet you. I recognize you from the photos on your blog."
Bonnie laughed, "And my blog didn't scare you off. That is good."
The wiry woman smiled, "Oh, it is wonderful and unique. Ever since you pointed me to your site, I've read every post you've made. You certainly will bring a new dynamic to our event."
That concerned Bonnie. "Am I that far out of the mainstream for your group?"
"Yes and no. You and your husband are right in your assertion that few in the Christian community are as monogamous as they pretend. I’m sure that that is even more true of this group than of churches in your community. But, by clearly proclaiming that far from being sinful, sex outside of marriage can be a positive good and part of the Christian life; you stake out something that many people here believe deep down, but few have the courage to say out loud.”
That was already a lot for Bonnie to process. What did she mean this group is less monogamous than people suppose? She didn’t want to presume to guess and she let the woman continue.
“This is a pretty progressive group and I have no doubt you will find a receptive audience here. But still, I have put a clear warning that your sessions contain very frank discussions and imagery of sexual behavior. Other than your teen session, minors who choose to come to hear you must be accompanied by a parent. We do have a good many older people, and some of them are not comfortable with public discussion of sexuality; but I think the disclaimer will keep them away."
"So, my images are OK?" Bonnie said referring to the material from her lectures she had sent in advance.
"I think they are spectacular. When someone on this year's planning committee saw your presentation in the fall, they could not stop talking about it. They were so impressed that even while you were talking to the alternative lifestyles group in Denver, you didn't hesitate to tell them that your message of sexual liberation is an outgrowth of your Christian faith. That is, in truth, what got you invited here."
The very fact one of the members of the committee who had invited her had even been at the conference in Denver said a lot to Bonnie. Feeling assured that this was a friendly event for her, Bonnie finished the registration procedure and then went to the lodge to check in to her room. There she was given the box of literature that her office always sent in advance of her speaking sessions. In short order, she was relaxing in her room and began to look through the booklet outlining the conference events, seminars, speaker bios, and general information. The first page listed the organizations that were co-sponsors. She was surprised at how many there were. All appeared to use the word Christian or something similar. Some were political groups like the Christian Socialists, others were issue groups like the Agape Environmental Action Committee, Migrant Mission, or the Christians for Social Justice. She took notice of the Christian LGBTQ group and a Christian nudist group called Eden Christian Fellowship. She was actually wary of both due to hostile reactions she'd gotten from similar groups in the past. She hoped that would not be the case here.
As she looked through the booklet, she found nearly a quarter of the sessions were how-to’s on organizing church or civic groups to fight for this cause or that. There was something called the "Final Freedom Sessions Track" which also included the LBGT and nudists sessions as well. She had no doubt where they had gotten that phrase. That in itself seemed like a victory for the FFF. Additionally, the convention had brought a sex educator from England who used live nude models in her sex-ed seminars for teens. Bonnie had heard of her and had seen a video of her presentation online. The text said that Eden Christian Fellowship was providing models for the session which was specifically for fourteen- to nineteen-year-olds. That was certainly interesting. Bonnie noted that she had two sessions on Thursday, and two on Friday. She would not be part of the Saturday events because at 5:00 AM she was taking the shuttle to the airport. She would be meeting her family at Atlanta/Hartsfield for the trip to St. Martin without going home first.
While she still had questions and concerns about Misty's proposed website, most of her concerns about the business part of her endeavor had been ironed out while working with Mike Marshal and Dean Toombs. Once they arrived in St. Martin and met with Mr. Kyle, it should all be formalities since the contract had already been agreed upon by both parties. Misty had already begun going through her thousands of photos to select the first batch to be turned over as the foundation for the new site. The issue of passports still weighed on her, they were supposed to arrive Thursday via overnight mail, but she would worry until Cooper texted her to say they had arrived at their home. All in all, it had all come together rather well, but that did not mean Bonnie was not apprehensive.
Reading the schedules, she could see that each day seemed to be broken up into segments. Two early sessions, then the late morning and early afternoons were devoted to light social and outdoor recreational activities for both kids and adults, before two sessions in the afternoon. There were nature hikes, downhill bicycle rides using the ski runs, and games geared for several different age groups. She took notice that one nature hike was sponsored by the Eden Christian Fellowship and would be a nude event. Bonnie thought that might be fun. She'd never been on a nudist nature hike. They also had two sessions on Christian nudism/naturism. Also in the booklets were the normal things about respectful conduct and sexual harassment. Then she saw under the heading of hot tubs this notice:
All the resort hot tubs are open from 6:00 AM to midnight. No glassware is permitted in or around the tubs and children under 16 must be supervised by a responsible adult.
As they have done for the past few years, Eden Fellowship is sponsoring clothing-optional evenings for those who wish to give Christian nudism a try. So, be advised that from 8:30 PM till close, you will encounter nude people in the large conversation tub northeast of the main lodge. If you find Christian nudity offensive, please avoid that area at night. Fellowship members will be present at those times to answer questions about Christian nudism and to ensure there is no inappropriate behavior.
The barrel tub and the sauna in the lodge are also swimwear optional while inside the sauna or tub only. The Eden Fellowship has asked us to emphasize that all standard family nudism rules apply to all three places, including a request that you respect the privacy of others and not use your camera phone to take photos of people not in your group.
That got her attention. She’d seen that the Eden Fellowship was one of the Founders Club sponsors. She guessed they had asked for those opportunities to give conference goers a chance to do things while out of town that they wouldn’t try at home. She’d seen that before. There is a willingness for people to try out things while at a convention they would never have the nerve to do in their daily lives. Certainly, she’d done that on her two Miami trips. How many couples had she invited to her room that said they’d thought of or even discussed having a threesome, but had never really done it before? From her memory, the number was around ten.
Since Bonnie had been on the road all day, she thought a nice soak in a hot tub would be really nice. She’d seen the old-timey barrel tub when she’d checked in, though because she hadn’t brought a swimsuit, she had assumed using it would not be an option for her. But perhaps she could soak in a tub after all. She would decide what to do after dinner.
Since this was the third day of the conference, most everyone seemed quite accustomed to the routine of the buffet dinner served in the grand ballroom. She made a plate of food before finding a place to sit by herself. She had only taken two bites when an older woman, perhaps in her late 50’s, came up to her table and asked, “Ms. Campbell, may we join you?”
Bonnie was a little surprised the woman knew her name, but she quickly reasoned that she must be one of the committee members who had invited her.
Once seated, the woman introduced herself, “I am Joyce Berman, and this is my wife, Sasha. I saw you at the Alternative Lifestyles convention in Denver back in the fall. I was really impressed. Your content was bold and you were not afraid of putting yourself out there. Most of all, I’d never heard anyone at that kind of convention openly assign their free-love lifestyle to their Christian walk. You had to know that conference was not particularly friendly to those who identify themselves as committed Christians. Yet, you didn’t even hedge your Christian identity. By the end of your session, I knew you were a perfect fit for this event.”
Bonnie smiled and said, “Oh, so you are the reason I’m here.”
The woman smiled back, “Yes, I’m afraid I am.”
Bonnie went on to tell the two women that she’d looked over the schedule and topics of the sessions. Given the fact the two women introduced themselves as being married, she asked about the LGBTQ group and the Eden Christian Fellowship. She explained how she’d been attacked by similar groups at other conferences. She wanted to know if that was likely to happen here.
“No, I don’t think so,” the woman named Joyce answered. “I understand that there are those who expect that everyone to buy into every jot and tittle of their ideology. Such people are quick to latch onto the slightest deviation as a justification for pretty much any sort of attack. I don’t think you will find that here. This is a conference that embraces a great variety of ways the Christian life can be lived. The central tenet here is we all embrace the teaching of Jesus, and that universal charitable love is the central theme of his message. Beyond that, we agree that there are a thousand ways to live that creed out in practice. So, I don’t think you will find outright hostility even from those who don’t see eye-to-eye with you.”
Bonnie nodded thinking about what the woman said, then was more specific. “But looking at the session catalogue, I seem to be the only one who is talking about Christian free love, Christian open marriage, or positive teen sexuality. Are those new ideas to this group?”
“No, not at all,” Joyce replied. “Last year we had a woman do two sessions on Christian polyamory. Since Sasha and I have been poly since before we met, we went to both sessions. Frankly, they weren’t very good. It was not that we disagreed with what she said, but rather she just wasn’t an effective speaker. As much as we like to pretend the ideas are what drives interest, the reality is the ability of the speaker matters more. That is why even before I left the Denver conference, I’d contacted the other committee members about you.”
This both reassured Bonnie and put pressure on her. The fact that someone on the speaker committee was openly poly gave her some assurance that she would not be lynched for her presentations, but she knew she had to be at her best at all four sessions. However, as she headed back to her room, she was very glad she’d gone down for dinner. She still had over an hour before the clothing-optional time at the hot tub, so she laid down for a nap. Before she’d started on the road, naps were simply not something she did; however, she’d learned in the past eight months that she should get rest when she could at these conferences… and how tiring travel could be.
Her phone alarm rang at 8:30. After a few minutes of thought, she decided to go to the small barrel tub rather than the larger one. She would wear one of the nice robes she’d found in her room over a towel she could discard just before she got into the water. If someone saw her in the process… oh well.
Fifteen minutes later she was relaxing in the steaming water. There were five hot tubs around the resort and she was pretty sure she was in one of the two listed as swimsuit optional after dark. She hoped so. A large thermometer by the tub said the air temperature was 27°F. That was as cold as the coldest day of a Sparta, Georgia winter. However, in the steaming hot water, it felt perfect.
She was a bit surprised that she was alone, but the peace and quiet was nice. She closed her eyes to relax. She must have dozed off because the next thing she knew, she was startled by a boy of about twelve or thirteen splashing into the water. A family had arrived to join her. She opened her eyes and saw two adolescent children followed by their parents. They all wore swimwear. Bonnie’s fears that she had not understood the dress code properly grew. She didn’t want to be offensive. As they entered the water one by one, they could not miss that Bonnie was nude despite the fog of steam that floated just above the water’s surface. However, after each of them showed a bit of surprise, only the boy failed to recover quickly and then pretend not to notice her bare breasts that were fully out of the water.
Once the family was situated, Bonnie said “I do hope that I read the convention material correctly and this is one of the swimsuit-optional hot tubs.”
The husband seemed flustered that she’d addressed them. Bonnie could tell he was making a real effort to keep his eyes off her chest by looking intently at her face. His wife was not so
constrained, she looked her over in the way only women look at other women. For a moment she seemed wary, but quickly put on a friendly face. She introduced herself as Phyllis before saying, “Yes, you read it right. The large conversation tub on the other side of the resort is where most of those who take advantage of this conference to go bare tend to gather. But this one is also designated as swimsuit optional as well since passers-by can’t really see into the tub, where we are. In past years, sometimes small groups, like two or three couples, will intentionally come here for quiet talks in the nude; but it has been rare to find people who have the nerve to… well do what you are doing on their own.”
The daughter, who Bonnie estimated to be about fifteen or sixteen, jumped in, “That is why we came here, they wanted to show they are not afraid of having naked people around my brother and me. But they didn’t really expect to find someone already in the tub. Mom and Dad say it's not wrong to go naked like you are, but they are just too chicken to do it.”
Before Bonnie could make a reply, the husband cut her off saying, “I think I know who you are. You are the woman from the Final Freedom Foundation. Right? I’ve already heard people talking about your sessions.”
Bonnie smiled at him and said, “Yes, I am. I’m surprised you recognized me without my foundation name badge.”
The wife laughed, “I guess it would be hard to pin on your outfit.”
Laughing too, Bonnie said, “Yes. I don’t think I’d like to try pinning on my name badge like this.” She was very glad that the woman made the effort to diffuse any tension. “Though I have actually presented in this outfit a number of times when I’ve spoken at nude resorts.”
Phyllis cocked her head, “Really? You have done your presentation in the nude?”
Bonnie nodded, “Yes, seven times. Though I wasn’t completely naked, I wore my sandals.”
That got the laugh she’d hoped for before Phyllis said, “Oh, I can’t even imagine trying to do that. Faith is right, we don’t believe that nudity is wrong, I’ve been to the Eden Fellowship’s sessions and I can see their point, but she is also right that I’m too chicken to try it. I’ve actually thought about going on the nude nature hike the last three years. They do it every year. Each year I get closer, but I haven’t been able to muster up the courage to try it. Last year I almost got up the nerve to go, but I backed out at the last minute.”
Bonnie chuckled, “I’ve never considered myself a nudist, but we live out in the country, and when it has been just me and my family, we have always sort of treated swimwear as optional at our home swimming pool. Some years our whole family have gone nude at the pool pretty much all the time, and other years, especially right after our daughter had gone through puberty, we didn’t do it so much. I’d never been to a nude resort until I was booked to speak at one this past fall, but I’d gone to the nude beach in Miami a number of times. Because of that, I actually didn’t find stripping down at the nude resorts difficult at all.”
Clearly, the woman, her husband, and daughter were interested in what Bonnie was saying. Their son seemed not to hear a word as he seemed to have been rendered catatonic by having a naked woman so close. The mother, Phyllis asked, “You said, your family went nude at your pool except when your daughter was embarrassed about her new body. Was it just her that covered up, or the whole family?”
Bonnie understood what she was asking, “The issue with embarrassment with her body and by extension everyone else’s came up even before the summer started. She got all upset one Saturday morning when she was twelve and found me in the kitchen making morning coffee. Misty, our daughter, burst into tears and told me to put some clothes on. You see, it’s been my thing since before the kids were born that on Saturday and Sunday mornings, I get up and make coffee for me and my husband, then get back into bed without getting dressed at all.” Bonnie paused and considered if she should say the rest, but decided that if they knew who she was, she should… “and normally that is followed by a morning round of love making.”
She saw the faces of both the mother and father go red with embarrassment, but the daughter just smiled even more broadly. From her own experience, that was not surprising that the teens were much less embarrassed by such things than their parents. Bonnie went on as if she’d not noticed anything. “She’d seen me naked in the kitchen a hundred times before, but that morning she just went to pieces. So, I put on a robe and we talked. She couldn’t put it into words why she suddenly found Mom’s nudity upsetting, but I understood. So that summer, without any announcement, my husband and I wore swimsuits anytime she was out at the pool with us. It was only the summer before last, after Misty talked me into taking her to the nude beach in Miami when she was sixteen, that she returned to going naked out by the pool as it had been before she got embarrassed by it.”
Phyllis’s eyes went wide, “Your daughter who asked you not to make coffee naked, asked you to take her to a nude beach?”
Bonnie couldn’t help but laugh. “I bet you know full well how different a twelve-year-old girl is from a sixteen-year-old.”
“Oh boy do I,” the woman replied.
At that, the teenage girl finally seemed embarrassed.
“You see, we stayed at a high-rise condo that primarily caters to Europeans. When we all went out to the pool the first time, my son was overwhelmed by what he saw… like your son is now.” It was the son’s turn to get a red face. “The pool and beach beyond it were all top optional for women. The truth was I’d never seen so many boobs on display in my life. Not just women in their 20’s, but teenagers, mothers, and grandmothers. That first time was just a look-see, but an hour or so later, my girl arranged for just her and I to go down to the pool, and without question or comment, she removed her bikini top. What was I to do but follow suit?”
The other woman laughed, but her daughter clearly had a gleam in her eye.
Bonnie went on, “So a few days later, when Misty and I were in a cab supposedly to go shopping, she asked if the two of us could go to the nude beach about fifteen minutes up the road. My agreement to go to the nude beach, less than two years ago, unbeknownst to me at the time, started a chain of events that led me to be here in this tub with you all, naked.”
Phyllis suggested, “That must be quite a tale.”
Bonnie nodded, “Yes, it is. Perhaps I should serialize it and post it on my blog. At least that would give me lots to write about. This blogging thing is still new to me.”
“You have a blog?” Phyllis asked.
“Yes, it is accessed through the FFF website.” She thought for a moment and corrected, “I think I was told how to get to it directly, but I don’t recall how. I’m not very tech savvy.”
Phyllis replied, “That is what teenagers are for.”
They all laughed, even her husband, whom the wife introduced as Dan. He then asked, “So when did you become a nudist? Was it then or later?”
“As I said, I’ve never really identified with the nudist label, even though last summer I went fully or partially nude most of the summer, indoors and out.”
“Why is that? Why don’t you call yourself a nudist even though you go nude quite a bit? If I might ask.”
Bonnie had answered the question many times in the past six months, but she’d been thinking about it and had a different answer than she’d used in the past. “Mostly because I don’t see going without clothes as an end in itself. That is sort of the whole thing of nudism, they believe going nude is inherently better. I don’t. Nude is sometimes better, like when I’m in a hot tub, or swimming. But clothes serve many important social functions as well as protection from the elements. And, to be quite honest, unlike nudists, I embrace the sexual nature of taking off my clothes.”
The parents and the teenage girl seemed intrigued by her and soon Bonnie was comfortably chatting.
Both husband and wife were ministers in an LGBT-friendly non-denominational church in Scottsdale, Arizona. The husband said he would have to miss Bonnie's main presentation because it was scheduled opposite of a workshop specifically on becoming a Christian ally for LGBT youth, but the wife said she would be there.
They were actually a very attractive couple. She had to consciously ignore the little tingle in her clit. At most events that little tingle was her body’s way of helping her identify a couple to invite to her room. But this was not that kind of event, so she ignored it… for now.
The wife said she would also make it to Bonnie's Friday session on raising sex-positive children. Their daughter (who appeared about fifteen) made a point to say she would be at Bonnie's session for teens. Her younger brother never said a word, though he did a lot of looking at her boobs and into the water trying to see what was underneath. His mother's face told Bonnie that later the boy would get a talking to about manners. Bonnie had to force herself not to laugh as she said she understood since she had a son who had just turned sixteen-years-old.
The facility had a large convention space where the group’s plenary session & breakfast was held at 8:15 on Thursday morning. Bonnie decided to attend the session (but not the breakfast) because she thought this convention represented a good many groups that could be helpful to the FFF. By her estimation, there was something between five and six hundred people in the hall but not surprisingly she saw only a few kids and no teenagers. After all, not only was the session early, it would be boring grown-up stuff. The meeting was a cross between an ecumenical church service and a political rally. The call to action to push back against the rightward shift in American Christianity was not subtle, but the details were muddled by so many causes. However, Bonnie did not miss that one of the causes was spelled out as the freedom of sexual expression. While certainly that included LGBT people, it also encapsulated the FFF's mission as well.
Later on, she decided not to join the Eden Christian Fellowship's nature hike after all. Though she planned to go, after hearing the high was to be in the mid 40's°F, she passed. Rather she went on a separate, clothed, nature walk wearing her warm coat, gloves, and hat. As per the instructions, she took the ski lift to the top of the mountain where the walk began.
She was glad she went. Not only did she get to meet more people, it was absolutely beautiful. When they returned to the chalet at the top of the mountain, box lunches were waiting for them and they picnicked overlooking the mountain tops. When she got back to her room, she typed out a quick blog entry and included a photo from the picnic before dressing for her sessions.
Bonnie had brought several options for what she would speak in because she wanted to feel out the people at the conference to get their mood. After looking at the skirts she’d brought, she chose the shortest one of the three, and of the four tops she had to wear under her blazer, she’d gone with a blue lace floral. She would have to keep the jacket buttoned until she had begun speaking in that the sheer portions were significant and they were, in effect, transparent. She picked out a bra that gave nice cleavage, but only covered the lower outside portion of her breasts. She chose to wear no hosiery with her pretty lace thong, which given the length of the skirt, would be seen if she sat on a raised stage and sat down. She checked herself in the mirror. Not for the first time she was pleased at how she had developed a "signature" look. It was professional but provocative.
As is common in convention centers, after lunch the largest hall was divided up into smaller, but not small, rooms. It was in one of these she was to give her first presentation, her standard FFF lecture. There were somewhere around two hundred people in the room. What got her attention right off was that over a dozen teenagers were in the room sitting with their parents. It didn't bother her, but it was a first. Before the scheduled start time she saw Phyllis and her daughter come in and sit right in the front row. Bonnie quickly went over to greet them and thank them for coming.
Phyllis explained, “After our time with you last night, any chance I’d miss your session disappeared. So here I am.”
Her daughter, Faith, was beaming. “And when I asked to come with Mom, amazingly my dad didn’t say I was too young for this. Last night he let me hang out with a hot naked woman, and today he’s letting me come to a session with a warning in the catalogue about nudity and sex. It's like he’s finally decided I’m not six years old anymore.”
Bonnie laughed, “Somehow, I suspect that you will always be six years old to him. It’s a dad thing. But if he’s anything like my husband, the next few years will be really hard on him. It’s been over a year since our daughter started having boys sleep over with her; but he is just now coming to terms with the fact she’s a young woman, not a little girl.”
Phyllis laughed, but her face also showed surprise when Bonnie said she’d been letting her high school age daughter have boys spend the night with her. The surprise was momentary, then she said “Yea, that will be Dan. He hasn’t said so yet, but last night was a big step for him. Not as much that he and I were with you, but that Faith and Harrison were right there with us… well mostly Faith.” She reached over and pulled her daughter close, “And that this girl participated in our talk with you in a very grown-up way. She acted very adult all night, perhaps too adult for Dan’s comfort.”
Bonnie couldn’t help but understand what she was saying. She wanted to continue this talk, but it was time for her to get things going. So she just said, “I know all about how hard it is seeing your little girl become a woman. I hope to see you later, if I do, ask me about how my girl surprised me with adulting when my mother-in-law was over a couple of weeks ago.”
With that Bonnie stepped onto the platform from which she was to speak. As she conducted her presentation, Bonnie could not help but look to see how the teens in the audience reacted to her content, particularly Faith. There was no question their eyes went wide at the first photo containing nudity, five minutes later was the first photo of people having sex. Bonnie had been using the slides for months now, and she was used to how audiences responded. Yet, interestingly the teens reacted less to the explicit sexual images than most adults did. When she got to the conclusion of her presentation and the set of photos of her having sex first with Cooper, then with Nell, and finally with Daniel, came up, she saw Faith react, but she appeared less startled than her mother. She and her mother both cut their eyes to the screen and back to Bonnie several times. Bonnie briefly made eye contact with Phyllis. She was sure the mother was not offended, only surprised. They both did the same when the last set of photos came up, the ones with her astride Salvador.
Importantly… thankfully, she didn’t see any angry faces in her audience, even from the parents of the teenagers. As usual, once she was done, she got a very positive reception. However, she didn’t have time to talk or answer questions afterward because someone from the convention came to the mic and asked everyone to exit because the next session was supposed to start in about five minutes. She was appreciative that the organizers had her next session in the same room.
It was time for her to present a totally new lecture, the one entitled, Sex: God’s Wonderful Gift to Young Christians. This of the three new, or revised lectures was the one she was most apprehensive about. She didn't know why. After all she spoke to as many teens every Sunday night as there were chairs in the hall. Her real concern was how direct to be. Though she had a better idea of the people at this event than she did when she was preparing the presentation, she still didn't know how far to push it. Yes, the catalog specifically stated that the session would deal frankly and explicitly about how Christian teens can incorporate their sexuality into their Christian walk and testimony. Specifically, the last sentence said, "Mrs. Campbell will not be teaching that teenage sex is inherently right or wrong; instead that it can be either one based on the participant's actions."
Ten minutes before the session was to start, there were less than a hundred teenagers, perhaps sixty-five or seventy. That was significantly fewer than she had every week at Youth Group. That did not bother her, from what she'd seen around the resort, she was sure she already had most of the teens at the conference and she was sure that more would show up right on time. The session was to begin at 4:15, but she had time to go over to greet the girl she had met the night before in the hot tub.
Bonnie said "Hello Faith. So your mother let you come even after seeing my first presentation?"
The girl smiled up at Bonnie, "Oh yes. After meeting you last night, my parents wouldn’t let me miss it. After spending the evening with you naked right next to us, your pics were no big deal."
"That's nice to hear. I'll admit that when your family found me in the nude like that, I was worried they would be offended."
"No, my parents are pretty laid back and they think it's good for us to be exposed to new things. Though they decided that given my brother’s behavior in staring at your boobs nonstop, he was not mature enough for this." Then Faith motioned to the girl in the seat to her right. She appeared to be a little older than Faith, more like Misty’s age. "This is Joy. Her mom and dad are co-pastors of our church. She went with her parents to your last lecture too."
Bonnie put out her hand to the girl. "Yes, I saw you. I believe your parents were sitting next to Faith’s mother. So, I didn't scare you off either?"
At first, the girl seemed startled that the speaker was addressing her and offering her hand, but she rapidly recovered to take Bonnie’s hand and say "Oh no. I thought it was terrific. I'm so glad they let me go with them."
Bonnie smiled "And were they still OK that you had gone with them once I was done?"
"I think a few times they got embarrassed that I was there… like when you showed the pics of you having sex. But afterward, they said they were very impressed and they thought it was good that I had gone with them."
Bonnie was glad to hear that. "Well, let's see how I do with a whole room full of teenagers."
The girls said earnestly "You can't go wrong. We are from the internet porn generation. There is nothing you can say or show that will shock us."
Bonnie laughed, "Oh is that a challenge?" She thought better of what she had said and added, "Not really, I'll be good." Then something came to her mind and to Faith she said, “Could you do me a favor?” With that Bonnie led the girl over to where she’d left her gear and picked up the Leica camera. “Since you are on the front row, could you act as my photographer? I like to post photos on my blog of my lectures, and this one will have some very provocative new slides. What works best is for you to get me on one side of the frame and the screen on the other.”
She then showed Faith how to use the rangefinder focus mechanism, which by this time Bonnie was quite used to doing since she tried to recruit a photographer at all of her engagements. As an afterthought, she said, “And yes, once I get going… especially if I take off my jacket and sit up on that stool you will see quite a bit of me. But of course, you saw me naked last night, and today I even wore panties with my miniskirt, which I often do not do. Sure, they are see-through lace, but it’s the point of it. But for my blog, I intend to be provocative. If I sit on my stool and you see up my little skirt, be sure I meant to do that, so don’t be afraid of shooting pictures when I do.”
Faith nodded and said, “Mom and I looked at your blog last night after we got back to our room. You’re not kidding about being provocative. But after seeing your presentation a little bit ago, what you put on your blog makes more sense. Of course, we didn’t read it all, but we saw the pictures, and that said a lot. I think Mom read more of it once I went to sleep, but you can be sure I’ll read it all before we get home.”
With that Faith took her seat, and Bonnie prepared to start her session. Unlike most places where she spoke, Bonnie did not have anyone to introduce her. That in itself was a little odd. She adjusted the mic and said "Hello" and waited. She looked over the crowd and doing quick math she estimated there were close to one-hundred teenagers. Though the catalog said the session was for ages fourteen to eighteen, the vast majority of them looked sixteen or under. There were also a dozen or so adults who had been directed to sit at the back of the room
Without saying anything else, she cued the first slide which said in bold letters "SEX IS GOOD."
The room went silent.
Into the mic she said slowly "Sex is good, full stop. That is my whole presentation."
The kids looked puzzled.
Only then did she introduce herself. “I am Bonnie Campbell and I am with the Final Freedom Foundation. We are dedicated to the proposition that sexual self-determination is the right of everyone, even teenagers. Sexuality is the final basic freedom that has not been granted to people in our country and we are working to change that.”
She then went into a very abbreviated version of how sex had been seen by virtually all their European ancestors, even the early European church, as positive and healthy. She showed a slide of an ancient mosaic of Jesus' baptism in the nude. His genitals were clearly visible.
She asked, "How many of you have ever seen an illustration of Jesus which shows his penis?"
Just the question seemed to stun both the kids and the handful of adults.
"Well? You do understand that Jesus did have a penis. Really, he did. And yes everyone saw it when he got baptized because until several hundred years into the Christian era, baptisms were always done in the nude. I'll go further, when Jesus was a teenager he got erections and had wet dreams. Of course, he did. And like every teenage boy that has ever lived, he played with that penis. I'm not sure why saying that would offend anyone, but I know it does. But I said it. So, now anyone who is offended, this is your time to leave before I begin to talk about how teenage sexuality can support, rather than hinder your Christian walk & witness."
She stopped and waited. No one left. “Let me start out by giving credit where credit is due, this presentation would not be what it is without the input at every stage from my own teenagers at home and their friends. They both just had birthdays so as of last week, my daughter Misty is now 18, and the week before that, Lamar turned 16. Their friends who helped by reviewing my work and making suggestions were all between 15 and 18. For instance, this was my first version of that opening slide.”
She put up a new slide that was filled with words saying: Consensual, age-appropriate sex that is done safely for the mutual benefit of all partners involved is beneficial to the committed Christian (including teenagers), regardless of one’s marital status or the type of genitals involved.
Bonnie read the slide and then said, “But my idea was shot down as being too wordy by every one of the teens I asked.
She got the laughs she’d hoped would break the teen’s nervousness.
“So, I went with this one.” Bonnie put back up the Sex Is Good slide. “So, please understand that when I say sex is good, what I mean is that longer phrase. I will mention all of those caveats later on.”
She waited a moment to signify the end of her introduction, then began. "O.K. With that out of the way I'm going to tell you a Bible story, one that I bet you have not heard in your Sunday School."
The next slide said "Solomon’s Love Song"
"We are going to look at a story told by Solomon about his relationship with a teenage girl when he was likely in his early twenties. It is told as a series of erotic vignettes using both the voice of the girl, the voice of young Solomon, and a narrator."
The first of the several dozen illustrations Bonnie had about this story was of a young woman. She looked vaguely like a younger version of Princess Jasmine in Disney's Aladdin. Bonnie had been insistent to the artist that the girl and Solomon must appear clearly to be Middle Eastern. Additionally in the revisions that she'd asked for, she had him portray her as about fifteen, not a grown woman. In the slightly Disneyesque cartoon, the girl was dressed simply and it showed her picking grapes in a scraggly-looking vineyard.
At this point, Bonnie unbuttoned her blazer and stepped out from behind the podium. Though she’d done this at the earlier session, and received the same reception she normally did when her audience realized her nipples were visible, she was curious how the teenagers would respond. Interestingly the teens responded slower as if they didn’t really understand what they were seeing. Once they did, she didn’t see a single frown, which she almost always did with adults. The girls mostly responded with a smile indicating they liked the idea they were being treated like adults; however, as each boy comprehended it, they got a blank stare. She decided to address the girls for a moment until the boys adjusted.
Bonnie began her narrative "I present the fifteen-year-old daughter of a poor vineyard owner. The text tells us her hands are calloused with hard work, her skin is darkened by her long days in the sun and her clothes are plain. Yet, she is extraordinarily beautiful. For our purposes, we will call her Hannah. It is the bronze age and Hannah lives in a collection of a dozen fiercely independent tribes under the nominal leadership of a young King named Solomon. When I say king, don't think of King Author or Louis XIV. No, this was a tiny kingdom of mostly poor rural people barely able to scrape out an existence."
"How a little nobody like Hannah got hooked up with the young King Solomon, the story chooses to leave out. Apparently, that was not the point of this story. Why, I don't know. But Solomon thought it not worth describing. However, this part is." A slide of Hannah standing outside of a mud brick house where she is talking to two other girls. "We start with Hannah telling her friends about her time with Solomon. She told them 'I love to kiss him so much. When he touches my skin, it makes me tingle like I’ve been drinking wine. No wonder all the girls in the village are jealous.' From there she goes on to unashamedly tell her friends that she has already had sex with him and calls his lovemaking skills intoxicating."
"Solomon's story skips right to their next rendezvous." The slide showed an image of Hannah with a young man who looked more than remotely like Aladdin, although, unlike Disney's Aladdin, this young man wore a short beard. They were walking in an orchard. "Hannah tells her lover, 'Please do not reject me because I am not a woman of wealth. My skin is so very dark and my body is slim from my long days working my family’s vineyard. Please tell me you love me anyway. Or do you love someone else?' To her words, the young Solomon replies, 'You are surely the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. If you think I love someone else, go and try to find her. But you never will. Believe me, though other girls are attractive, you are more beautiful than any girl in Israel. Your beauty is beyond that of any woman I have ever laid eyes on.'" Bonnie paused, “First let me say that when he says woman, he does not mean our definition of women being over twenty-one. No, in his world a woman is any female who has reached womanhood, which means she’s had her first period. Given she was not already married she was most certainly sixteen or younger. My guess is around fifteen. Girls, I don’t know about you, but I think what he is saying is pretty romantic stuff even three thousand years later. He then calls for his servant and instructs him to have a necklace of gold and pearls made for her."
In the next illustration, they are sitting on a rug. Bonnie continues, "Another day finds them sitting under a fir tree picnicking. According to the text, as she sits close to him her erotic desire becomes so great that Solomon can smell the aroma of her arousal. Yes, the Bible text says she was so wet that he could smell it. She tells him, 'I wish you were like this necklace you gave me.'" The next image appeared. The frame shows her with her top pulled down and her young breasts exposed. ‘“Then you would always be between my breasts.'”
A frame of his face, "He tells her that she is like fragrant flowers and asks 'How can I describe your beauty?'.”
"Then Solomon records that they began to make love." The next two slides showed them fully nude having sex on the carpet. In the second, they are in the lotus position so they are face to face.
Bonnie read from the paraphrase of Song of Solomon that Cooper had made for her, "As they made sweet love she says, ‘How handsome and kind you are. How luxurious is our bedroom with its ceiling of fir. I am the Rose of Sharon. I am like a lily in a valley of beautiful flowers.' He corrects her analogy and says 'No, compared to other girls you are the only flower among a sea of thorns.' They continue to make love and later she tells him 'You cover me with your love and bring me pleasures I did not think I could ever know. I am just so lovesick.' The text records how, in order to comfort her, he slides his right hand under her head and wraps his body around hers in a loving erotic embrace."
Bonnie paused to let it all sink in. An image on the screen of the couple spooning appeared. "Well girls, how's that for pillow talk?"
She got several cheers.
"So, guys, this is the Bible and so this is the way a young man should treat a young woman when they make love. Please note that nothing he does is demeaning to her. There is no hint of coercion. There is nothing but an effort to make her feel like the most wonderful young woman on earth. Do I hear an "Amen" from the girls?"
Far more voices supported Bonnie's call this time.
"Solomon tells how their love affair continued through the spring, summer, and into the fall. Then he tells of one afternoon they were hiding away in their special love grotto." In the current slide, they were snuggled fully clothed in a rock alcove by a pool of water. "According to him, as they talked Solomon asked her to take off her clothes saying 'I find both your voice and your body to be equally beautiful."
"She invites him saying “I am yours and you are mine. Go down on me and eat at the fragrant garden between my legs.'"
Bonnie stopped on a slide that showed Hannah lying on her back as Solomon gives her oral sex. "As Solomon said in Ecclesiastes, there is nothing new under the sun. Each generation thinks it has discovered things anew, but in fact they have been around forever. I would add that is especially true for sex. Cunnilingus… going down, taco munching, pussy eating was not invented in your generation. Women have been enjoying it since before the beginning of recorded history. And yes, when I was your age, I enjoyed it too… though to be honest, I had to spend months teaching the guys who lived near me to do it right, but once they learned, they enjoyed giving it as much as I liked receiving it. Cunnilingus, whether I am the giver or reciever is truly a win-win activity.”
She paused and then asked “Right girls?”
This time there was a resounding chorus of agreement. Bonnie knew she had them now. Though she was quite sure that only a fraction of those girls had actually experienced cunnilingus, that was not the point. The point was that she validated the idea that their sexual needs and desires mattered. Bonnie casually took a seat on the stool that had been provided for her before going on. She knew her lace panty would be fully visible and that was her intent. This method of drawing in teens had worked for her in the past, though this time she’d not gone bare beneath her mini-skirt. The teen’s eyes went wide just as she expected.
Bonnie continued on without using her notes, "The story tells how Hannah went on to tell Solomon 'Until night falls I want you to be a strong buck rutting me without stopping.' Yes, the Bible records her asking him to fuck her brains out all afternoon."
She knew the word fuck would again set them off balance. That was the plan.
"For the sake of time, I will just summarize the next few chapters by saying one day she can't find him where she expected him to be. She went all over looking for him. Finally, she found him and she grabbed him and pulled him to her mother’s house where they made love on her mother’s bed."
Bonnie again paused. "I can feel for Hannah's mother. I've been there. I have had to wait till my daughter and her lover finish in my bed before I can lay down." She rolled her eyes and shook her head.
More laughs.
“It’s true. I have a king-sized bed with a mirror over it and my daughter, who will be graduating from high school in a couple of months, occasionally uses it with her boyfriends.” Yes, she expanded the word boyfriend to all of the Euro-Club guys with whom Misty had sex, but she was sure that was a legitimate use of the story.
"The next chapter is about the wedding. Contrasting to their low-keyed love affair, the wedding was a big one befitting a king. And I should note that it was a year after they first had sex when they got married. I know full well that all too many Christian leaders would have you believe that pre-marital sex ruins the wedding night. But, let me read you what Solomon says about his wedding night: Once in bed he gently says to her 'You are so beautiful, my love, you are so beautiful. Your hair sweeps across your face like gossamer lace. Your mouth is perfectly formed and from your passionate lips comes the voice of love. From your mouth, I am drawn down to your perfectly formed breasts which are firm, and yet, magically delicate. They are lovely identical twins which I love to suckle as a baby. Until night comes I will explore the mound from which flows your erotic feminine fragrance.'"
As Bonnie read, a series of slides illustrated the words.
"Hannah responds to his sweet words by saying 'You are so handsome my love. Your body is perfect in every way. Together we will reach the peak of ecstasy. Dear husband, we will reach such heights of pleasure that we will look down on the highest mountains.' He looked deep into her eyes and responded, 'You, my wife, can overwhelm my heart with just one look. How beautiful you are, my lover. There is nothing on earth that can compare with the joy I get from making love to you. There is no perfume to compare with the scent that comes from between your legs when you are ready to make love. It fills the air and lingers in your clothes. Your lips touch my body in the most sensual ways to bring me exquisite pleasure. Within the folds of your vulva are contained the most pleasant of aromas and there I taste flavors beyond description. Your body holds all these things in secret until you choose to open the gate and let them flow out as a river.”
Again, Bonnie paused "Wow! I've got to take a break to get my breath."
She fanned her face.
More laughs.
Dramatically, she removed her suit jacket and laid it aside. She pretended not to notice their reaction to her exposure.
"Now we in the West don't usually spend so much time speaking of the smells of love making, but in Eastern cultures it is a common refrain. And keep in mind this is the Biblical model of how loving couples talk in bed. Let me finish this up. Solomon says that she pulled him close and whispered to him, “The oil of erotic desire is flowing from between my thighs. I hope the breeze is bringing you the scent. Oh, my lover, please come into me now. Put your mouth to the most sensitive part of my fragrant garden and taste my love.' The text goes on to say how the erotic words gave way to more passionate sex. Am I making my point clear? This is what God wants your life to be like. As I said at the beginning, sex is good."
"Now, if all that did not surprise you, how about the closing part of the chapter? It tells about what we might call the private wedding reception for their closest friends. It seems that while the bride and groom were going at it, their close friends had been having a party waiting for them to finish. When Solomon and Hannah emerged from their bed chamber, he took her hand and in a voice loud enough for everyone in the pavilion to hear, he said to Hannah, 'We have made glorious love. Our sexual fluids have joined within your body. I have tasted and enjoyed the sweet love you have to offer. We are now truly man and wife.' Then he turned to his friends and shouted 'Now we will all celebrate! And may each of you have the same erotic pleasure that we now enjoy!' That is a wedding tradition that I think we should bring back. It would certainly liven up dull receptions."
There was a good deal of laughter. She knew she'd reached the audience.
She then went on, "Now that is not the end of the Song of Solomon, there is more narrative and even more explicit sex talk. Hannah talks about his body in some detail and he goes on to rave about how wonderful making love to her is; but, I think I've made my point. So, with that as background, I will introduce my topic. Namely, How Young Peoples' Sexuality Can Benefit their Christian Walk and Witness."
"Let's go back to the slide of Jesus. Yes, my story had a good many illustrations of nudity. Without dwelling on it I want you to know that public nudity is not a sin. The next slide was an illustration of a young man and woman dropping their tunics to be baptized in the nude. Their genitals were clearly visible as many people looked on. Bonnie explained that in the early church, only teenagers and above could be baptized and they always entered the water nude, in front of the entire congregation. "God does not want us to be shamed by the body he gave us." She looked right at Faith. "What do you think? Did I try to hide myself when your family joined me in the hot tub last night?"
The girl shook her head.
"Why should I have been embarrassed they found me naked while they wore their swimsuits? I had actually planned to go on the nude hike today, but I'm sorry, I'm a warm-weather-only nudist."
Laughs.
"Perhaps when I said sex is good, I should have said sexuality is good, because what I mean is not just fucking, but the entire experience of our sexuality is a good thing. For far too long Christians have been taught the lie that sex is inherently sinful. Young people have been told sex is like a roaring beast that is seeking to devour them if they let it out of a tight cage. That is just not so. God did not curse you with your sexual nature! It is a blessing. If you remember nothing else I say, remember this: Your teenage sexuality is a blessing from God."
"I want to hear you say it. Say with me, my sexuality is a blessing from God." The slide had those words in big letters.
"Together. My sexuality is a blessing from God."
As she’d expected, only a few followed. "Come on, everyone." The second time she got a much better response. The third time she pretty much had everyone.
"Your sexuality is not a raving beast seeking to devour you. Rather think of it as a spirited horse you've been given. Your horse can be used for practical functions like pulling a wagon or it can be used just for fun. The more skills you develop as a rider the more you get out of your horse. And you, and only you, can decide how and when you want to use your horse. You might decide to simply let it pull you in a buggy at a walk. You could also ride fast to get your heart racing. But however you use your horse, if you get beyond your skill level you can and likely will get hurt. It would not be the horse's fault you fell off, but your own." She went on to speak of personal responsibility and preparedness for some time before going on to the next topic.
"What makes the sex life of a Christian different is not how often you have sex, or how old you are, or the genitals of your partner, or even your marital status. What makes the sex life of a Christian different is that the Christian always holds the welfare and happiness of their partner as just as important as their own… not more important, but equally important. A follower of Christ, even a teenage follower of Christ, can fully enjoy their sexuality with a variety of partners, but they can’t find any kind of enjoyment from sex that is selfish or self-serving.”
Bonnie went from there to expound on the idea of sexual morality based on the welfare of everyone involved and then to the concept of sexuality encompassing far more than just the act of intercourse. She tried to give the young people a positive vision of the sexual life of a committed Christian. In the course of her presentation, she took a few minutes to address masturbation in particular.
"I am a married mother of two teenagers, and guess what? I still love to get off all by myself. My vibrator always sits out on my end-table and it never collects dust."
That got some laughs.
She then told the story of how one day she was really horny but her sex toys had all disappeared. She went on to tell them how she found them all in her daughter's bedroom. She gave an exasperated look which got more laughs.
Then when she got to the part where Misty waited quietly until Mom was climaxing to let her know she was in the room, the audience first gasped then laughed. She even had cartoon slides illustrating her story which, as expected, helped her seem more real to the audience.
"I started occasionally masturbating to orgasm when I was about thirteen and by the next year, I was doing it pretty much every night. Now contrary to what you may have been told, masturbating to the thought of having sex with your favorite Game of Thrones character is not the same as a married man coveting the wife of his neighbor. That's good because I'd jump Ned Stark's bones in a heartbeat."
More laughs.
"And when I was a teenager, I climaxed more to fantasies of Richard Gere than I can count. Even now, he is so handsome with that silver-grey hair. OK, yes, I still can climax to fantasies of Richard Gere."
More laughs.
“The reality is that teenagers… or anyone, can have a fulfilling sex life all by themselves. But, most of you at some point will want to share your sexuality with a partner. I can't tell you when that should be. It might be tomorrow and it might be when you are twenty-two. Only you will know." She spent some time discussing the idea that those who have had intercourse are no more grown up than those who have not. Then she went on to discuss how sexual activities prior to intercourse are not second rate, but can be more than enough and intercourse is not necessary to have a deep loving relationship.
She went on to make it personal by saying, “I have permission from my son and his girlfriend to tell you about how they waited for four months to have vaginal intercourse, yet they had a wonderful sex life during those months waiting for the time to be right for them.” She went on to tell in explicit detail about Lamar and Sarah learning to pleasure each other short of intercourse using both their mouths and fingers. “Now this didn’t happen on its own. His girlfriend’s mother is a close friend of mine, and jointly we talked to them and highly recommend that they spend several months learning everything about each other’s body and how to make it feel good… and yes, how to get each other off.”
She finished that part of her talk up by telling the teens about the evening Lamar and Sarah did sixty-nine on the poolside daybed, though she skipped the fact that Cooper, Misty, and Marcy were still at the table on the other side of the pool while they did it. She also decided it was best to leave out the part about them enjoying other guys fucking Sarah while they made out.
One of the photos taken by Faith of Bonnie’s presentation
“And surprise, surprise, when they finally began having intercourse over Christmas break, they had an amazing first experience… and I should note they both joyfully told their parents all about it… in detail. Neither my son nor his girlfriend had been raised to believe there was anything the least bit shameful about enjoying their God-given sexuality and since we essentially let them live together for most of Christmas break, they did it a lot those first few weeks.”
More laughs.
“By the time our school routine got back on track, they had a lot to tell and they didn’t have the least bit of shame telling the sweaty, sticky details over multiple dinners.” She threw up her hands in mock exasperation.
More laughs.
“In January, my son directly told me that he understood why his girlfriend’s mother and I had encouraged them to wait. He said he realized that had they jumped right to fucking, it would have short-circuited his ability to patiently learn how her body responds to every little touch. And yes, he used that word to describe vaginal intercourse. We are very direct about sex in our home.”
More laughs.
“And since then, more than once his girlfriend has thanked me for that advice as well.”
Integral to Bonnie’s discussion was the idea that one’s partner's consent alone is not enough to make it moral. "You might be thinking that all you hear is how important consent is. So what is this crazy woman saying? I'm saying it clearly, consent is absolutely required; but for a Christian, your partner passively consenting is not enough for you to engage in a sexual act with him or her. To carry out the command to love your partner as yourself, you must be sure your partner wants to do that thing, not that they will just tolerate doing it. Before you have oral sex for the first time, both you and your partner should have agreed in advance that you are ready for that step and that you really, I mean really, want to do it. If one of you is ambivalent, then don't do it. The risk of harming your partner's self-respect is too great."
"And guys. Let me make something else clear. Just because a girl wanted to suck your dick last week, does not mean she wants to do it today. If her actions make you unsure if she is enthused about doing it today, then ask. It's just that easy. Let her know you do not think she is obligated to do anything that she has done before. And I'll promise you this, if you take that approach you will get a lot more great blow jobs than if you presume."
More laughs.
All through the talk illustrations supported her words. Sometimes seriously, other times the pictures were deliberately funny. Whereas the teens illustrated in the Song of Solomon were all Middle-Eastern looking, the teens in the rest of the lecture had a variety of ethnic looks. The illustrations also had a few same-sex pairings of couples, but Bonnie deliberately failed to comment on them. Like always, she did not want to get bogged down in the morass of labels for sexual preferences or identity. Only once did she speak directly about homosexual sex. She took the time to say “Having enjoyable sexual play with your same-sex friends does not make you gay. The truth is that only a small minority of people are truly monosexual. This word refers to people who can only get turned on by sexual touch by someone whose genitals are different from their own. Most, almost all, people who have not been specifically and deliberately taught not to do so, will on occasion enjoy erotic interaction with people who have either type of genitalia."
It was only after discussing the breadth of sexual behaviors she addressed sexual intercourse itself. "But, having talked all about other types of sexual interaction, I’ll say it directly: fucking is wonderful… it is like nothing else. You see doing the deed is like pizza, when it is hot it is indescribably delicious. But, when it is cold, well it's pretty good too." She knew that joke had been around forever, but she was pretty sure for most of her audience it would be new. She, for the second time in her talk, took a few minutes to address safety issues after which she went on a rant about how she hates the word "virgin" and even more the idea of losing one's virginity. "YOU DON'T LOSE ANYTHING WHEN YOU HAVE SEX THE FIRST TIME!" she quite literally yelled at the top of her lungs. She challenged them to never, ever use the word virgin unless talking about cocktails without alcohol.
That got more laughs.
Then she gave them the term "sexual debut" before addressing the question of when to know when one is ready for their sexual debut. "Though many teens don't feel they can tell their parents they would like to have sex for the first time; given the fact your parents are at this conference, I would think that nearly all of you here in this room can do so. I highly suggest you bring them into your planning for the event. If my son and daughter were here they would tell you that was exactly what they did. Both of their sexual debuts were planned. For the big event, both received support and logistical help from their parents. Both of them would tell you they are very glad they did so."
Eventually, she came to her conclusion. "You Probably thought that you were going to get all the way through this talk without a list of rules. Well, actually you are. But I will give you a list of suggested guidelines. There is no need to write them down, I have two-hundred laminated wallet cards with them for you to take with you. They also have my email address so that you can contact me if you need to. I've already discussed all these topics but here they are all together."
Guidelines for Christian Teenagers
1. Your teenage sexuality is not a curse, but a powerful gift.
2. Fully explore your sexual pleasures alone before you invite a partner.
3. Never use sex to get or keep a partner.
4. Consistent condom use shows love better than words.
5. Mutually decide in advance what sex acts are on the menu.
6. Christian sex acts never need coaxing; they are mutually desired.
7. Christian sex leaves both partners better than before: mentally and spiritually.
8. As a teen, don't commit yourself to any sexual label.
“Let me leave you with a final thought using me and my family because those are the people I know best. I have been married for over twenty years, but I have sex with my friends from church and their husbands. Most weeks I travel, I share my bed with a couple I meet at my meetings. When I am on the road, I ensure that my husband does not sleep alone. A group of my church friends take turns sleeping with him when I am not there. Tonight, and tomorrow night, while I am here, he will be having sex… perhaps I will too, one never knows.” She prompted laughter with a funny look.
“My daughter has a boyfriend and a girlfriend and my son has two girlfriends. Yet they both also have sex with their other friends from our Youth Group. The sexual lives of my family are not in spite of them being committed Christians, it is an outgrowth of our Christian walk. Each of us treat every partner with Christian respect and compassion. All four of us take the welfare and safety of our partners as paramount because it is our Christian obligation to ensure that after sex, our partners feel better about themselves than before we started.”
“I can’t tell you when it is right for you to begin having sex, nor with whom you should do it. But what I can tell you is that your sexuality is integral to who you are and your Christian life. St. Paul told us that whatever we do that is not based in faith is sinful, even if it is not sinful in itself. If you are unsure if it is right for you to have sex, then don’t do it because that is not walking by faith. On the other hand, for you to abstain from using your body and sexuality to share God's love because you feel pressured to treat sex as dirty and shameful, is also not walking by faith. Each of you has your own path to walking by faith. My purpose today is to tell you that it might be God’s path for you to use your sexuality to uplift, encourage, and show God’s love to those in your life; not that it is God’s path for you. I’m not saying you should start having sex as soon as you leave this room. I don’t want any of you to go tell your parents that Bonnie Campbell said you need to get laid tonight.”
As expected, the room filled with laughter. Even the adults at the back of the room were laughing.
What I am saying is it is up to you to determine how God wants you to show his love to others. Then do so…. safely”
“Thank you.”